Charging Through Life

I was at the gym on the treadmill today pushing further than I ever have pushed before - and that was after having done a round on the elliptical. For me, it was pretty incredible.

What was getting me so amped and pushing me beyond what I would normally do, cardio wise, was one of Casey Alva's remix sets and the song, "Incredible" by The Shapeshifters. It was moving through me something fierce and it was helping to push my fat ass further than I normally would have on that damn treadmill.

Had enough of the same old time.
My senses they need reviving.
Giving up on just getting by.
It's time for a brand new feeling.

And I thought how Incredible it is that I don't half to go back to Beachbody anymore! I was not learning, or growing or being challenged there. The job was stifling my career and it was effecting my life and my emotions. Plus, as we damn well know, they weren't paying me very much and I am tired of not having the funds to do what I want to do with my friends and with my life.

We all need comfort when times are hard.
Come on and hide away. There's no pretense here.
Don't need a thing, leave your credit card.
Put it all behind.
Had enough of the same old vibe.
All our senses they need reviving.
Give it up, we're on borrowed time.
Make way for a brand new feeling.

And I thought, wouldn't it be wonderful if I made the decision not to go into panic mode over having just been fired? Wouldn't it be great to just take some time for myself? What if I were to let go of the notion that I had to be working at a job right now and instead decided to work on myself for a while? Wouldn't that be Incredible?

I've been in this situation before: out of work, responsibilities and bills looming, the pressure to succeed and not fail out here on my own weighs upon my pride. And in those times I do the same thing -- I bust my ass looking for the next job. But really, that next job has always just been a little bit of money to satisfy those responsibilities. What if this time, I looked for something that I really loved and didn't settle on the first thing that came my way? A job I love to go to every day - that would be Incredible.

In the past when I've been without work, I've gone into this shut-down mode where I hoard cash and stay cooped up at home in order to save what little money I might have. What if this time I relax and trust my wits and The Universe by believing that money will come back into my life when I need it? What if I allowed myself to (responsibly) try some new things and have some new experiences away from the familiar? I could hire a trainer who would help push me at the gym and who really knows how to target my problem areas. I could hire a Life Coach and we could discuss my past mistakes while really exploring where I should be in the next stage of my career. I could take a cooking class and learn to cook with more fresh vegetables. I could spend a little money fixing up my house and making it a better place than it is. I could maybe travel a bit on my own and see another part of the country - that would be Incredible.

Somewhere along my life, I got it into my head that a Man's life consists of getting up, going to the office, working, coming home, and repeating. What if I took some time to discover a new routine? I could find time to practice daily meditation and even go to weekly meditation groups. I could give back to my community while finding satisfaction through volunteering. I could organically discover new interests and new things, thereby shaping me into a more rounded and interesting person - fuck, that would be Incredible.

I was raised to believe that I always had to be going to a job every single day. So when I've found myself without work before, I make job hunting priority #1 and I raced to land something fast. What if this time I put me first and work second? What if I decided that it's OK to be without a job for the next three months or so? I would, of course, look every day and make job hunting an important part of my daily routine because you never know when a great opportunity will present itself and you half to be prepared to recognize it. But I would also take the time to re-define who I am. I've always defined myself by what I do. Finding an answer to the typical first-date question, "what do you enjoy - what are your interests," would be Incredible.

Make way for a brand new feeling.